Monday, June 14, 2010

Regrets

There is nothing like being pregnant again with two toddlers running around to make you feel like a bad mom. On top of it you see couples with their "one child" their perfect joy as they have everything set up to enjoy their baby. Sure they have their problems, but it's so hard to enjoy your kids when you can't wait for them to go to sleep so you can crash as well to escape the agony of your stomach. I often wish I could have had that perfect timing, that I could have waited until things were just perfect before I had a baby so I could put everything into my baby and not have to worry about how to make ends meet. But alas it is not so, I love my kids and I try to be a good mom, but it can be so hard sometimes. And with another one on the way there are more and more times I want to just run away. I know things will get better, the kids will grow up and after the whirlwind as passed I know I'll be left with more regrets. How I didn't spend more time with them, how I didn't do this or that, and I will miss them. All I want to do is enjoy them, but once in a while I wish I could just.....